Determined to Succeed

I have been back at school since Saturday afternoon and I didn't realize how much I missed it here until I was back. But I'm going to be completely honest, I pushed off this blog post because I was ashamed in myself. And it's silly. I know most people won't get the way that I think but those who know me well for the most part understand. I am my worst critic and that is something I have been struggling with as far as I can remember. I automatically stress when I don't go above and beyond, it can be such a roadblock in my life. 

Anyways, that brings me to this week. I get back to school and I have met most of my goals. SO awesome. The only goal that I didn't meet was going to the gym 3 times/week because I was sick the last week I was home and it got to the point it was affecting my asthma. When I started running I made the commitment that I was not going to put my health on the line, so I rested until I could sit on the couch without wheezing and feeling like there was no air in my lungs. Real sweet feeling. 

I met all of my other goals. I should be happy, right? Not the case. I spent the beginning of this week beating myself up over so many things. Looking back I feel foolish but it's just my mentality. I hate my asthma and I was freaking out about how hard it has been for me to add distance. In perspective, many asthmatic people don't even attempt to run, so it should be something to be proud of. But I was just having such a hard time with that. Also, I'm five pounds from goal, which means I lost 3-4 pounds in the month I was home. That's fantastic for the time of year where most people are worried about putting on weight. But I was bummed that I didn't lose more and bummed because I feel like these last five pounds are going to take forever. How dumb is that? I've already lost close to 30 pounds but I'm beating myself up over 5??! In all honesty though, that's just the way my mind works. Putting it into perspective, I feel much better. 

All that to say--today I ran 2.5 miles straight! And to think a month ago I had never ran more than a mile straight! That was definitely the confidence boost I needed and put me right back on track. I've got this. Soon I'll hit 5K length then maybe I'll add more distance. I've also been working on speed again this week by adding in interval workouts, so fingers crossed that those help a little bit. I'm going to be realistic with speed because of my asthma, but it would be nice to be able to do a 5K in under 30 minutes. 

Yesterday's interval run! I didn't get a pic of today's 2.5, ugh!

Hopefully I'll have some exciting news soon! And to those of you that began school this week like me--happy first week back!